The Resilient Mindset
In this second blog in our personal resilience series, we will be looking at the resilient mindset.
Our thoughts drive our feelings which determine our behaviours. We could think of these as 3 pillars which support our personal resilience. In this post we will look more at the thoughts which promote resilience and allow us to bounce back from what other people may label “failure”.
Famous "Failures"
Here are just a few examples of famous faces who have succeeded in their fields despite many setbacks along the way. Whilst many might have given up, these individuals persevered in pursuit of their goals. What they have in common is the ability to stay focussed on their goals give up – instead they focus on the learning they can take from each experience and apply it in their next attempt and reframe “failure” as “learning”.
J K Rowling
In a Harvard Commencement speech, J.K. Rowling spoke about failures:
“You might never fail on the scale I did,” Rowling told the new graduates. “But it is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all—in which case, you fail by default.”
When Rowling wrote the first Harry Potter book, she was divorced, bankrupt and on benefits.
After a dozen publishers rejected her manuscript one finally agreed to publish it. But the publisher told Rowling that she needed to get a job because there’s no money in children’s books.
She’s now a billionaire.
James Dyson
It took 5 years and 5,126 failed prototypes for James Dyson to develop the world’s first bagless vacuum cleaner. 10 years later Dyson setup his own manufacturing facility, because other manufacturers wouldn’t produce his vacuum. Now he has the best selling vacuum in the world. According to The Sunday Times, in 2013 his net worth was 3 Billion Pounds.
The Beatles
The Beatles were rejected by numerous record labels including Decca Records, which said, “guitar groups are on the way out” and “the Beatles have no future in show business.” They did get signed by a record label and the Beatles sold more singles in the UK than anyone else, and the Beatles have moved more units in the US (more than 177 million) than any other group.
Michael Jordan
Michael Jordan, considered by many to be the greatest basketball player of all time, was devastated when he was dropped from his high school basketball team. Fortunately, this “failure” only inspired him to work harder.
Here’s what he said about failure:
“I have missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game winning shot, and I missed. I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”
What do all these people have in common?
The magic ingredient for all these people is that they don’t view setbacks as failure or as a reason to give up – instead they focus on the learning they can take from each experience and apply it in their next attempt. In thinking this way they have truly adopted a resilient mindset allowing them to bounce back from what others may regard as failure.
No Failure,Only Feedback
This is an NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) presupposition which reframes “failure” as “feedback”. Feedback is just regarded as information which can tell you whether you are on track or not. If the answer is “yes”, then carry on doing what you are doing. If the answer is “no”, keep going but make the necessary adjustments to get back on track.
The Growth Mindset
The growth mindset is a learning mindset which sees success as a journey, not a destination. Focus is directed towards effort, learning and developing. The fixed mindset on the other hand is much more digital – the only choices being win or lose, succeed or fail. If Michael Jordan had a fixed mindset he wouldn’t have been able to see the positives in losing a game!
How to Cultivate a Resilient Mindset
In the coming week, if you have an experience where the outcome doesn’t meet with your expectations – maybe you feel like giving up and labelling yourself a failure, try asking yourself these simple questions in order to flip into a growth mindset:
- What can I learn from this experience?
- How could I use this learning – what could I do differently next time?
Like most change work, developing a resilient mindset is really about developing a new habit- in this case a new way of thinking. Like any new habit it takes practice and some conscious effort. So if you do find yourself forgetting, don’t fall into old habits of negative thinking, focus on how you are going to remind yourself to think differently next time. With practice you will find that before you know it, the growth mindset becomes your default setting.
Next time we will look at how understanding of the triggers of stress and anxiety can help to develop and maintain resilience.
Find Out More
Download our free resilience factsheet here
Watch our resilience video on YouTube here
Attend our Resilience Workshop – Details are here
